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Happy Birthday World, ( i know im a few days late)

I wish all of my loyal readers and even those of you of yiou who don't read this( how ur reading this i don't know!!) a שנה טובה ; a year of tranquility and peace throughout especially in Eretz Yisrael, heck, א"ה this video will even come true.

As if i have patience to think...who are u fooling?

Since there's no way I can try and figure out where my blog life left off and took an extended break(get used to it, sorry) I'll have to just ramble here, but that's nothing new. so this past shabbos i was in college park with my buds; noam, jacob, jacob's handsome black hat and of course matthew and neal. kudos to neal for making a killer cholent, some real me'ein olam haba going on over there. it was an awesome shabbos all together: leading off with entemann's donuts after kabbalat shabbos, only in hillel im telling you, going to chabad for dinner, being crammed with 200 other ppl, but so much cooler than hillel, these ppl are'nt frum but at least they don't act it. ok i'm joking, that was mean. even tho we stayed for 2 hrs or so we barely got to the main course and instead ditched off to the new JLI couple, the Kohls for an awesome tisch/oneg thingy. i felt like it was israel, nice and relaxed finnaly, their apt stairwell looked exactly like israel, like 2 apts on this shady staircase that only served those 2 apts (terrible explanation but take my word for it). through our umd bashing and a current rosh yehshiva's imitations we had a great time. o and then how cud we forget since we're on a college campus on a friday nite, how can u not go to a party?? so, yes there was a birthday party of this orthodox guy so i tagged along and had my chiyuv of 3/4's a beer, that was 75% water. then weird stuff happened but as jacob can vouch for i did not go outside. shacahris i get an aliyah...i love that place, both times i go i get one. my friend who lives there has never gotten and also other ppl..weirdness. of course lunch was awesome. after walking around in the afternoon matt and i sit down and i get stuck rambling to this wacked out consevative girl. i was, no joke, going to shoot her had i been handed a gun. i have never heard ne on so annoying, so freakish, so "i have no friends and u look like fresh bait to pick on". i dont know wut she was thinking cursing every 2 seconds abt the most retarted things. like there's only so nice i can so thank G-d for her i was in a good mood. o and shout out to matt who "reminded" me in the middle of this dialouge or shud i say yelling match by her, that we had to go wake up some guys or something inside so thankfully that got rid of her. o and for some weird reason i woke up to a nice, clean footmat, like the ones we have outside our houses, on my car windsheild. i guess it's like a welcome gesture u get when u visit a knox box, i dunno. also weird that i cudve sworn i made double sure that all the doors were locked, but on sat nite when we're leaving i notice 1 or 2 of them are unlocked. well i do a good job of hiding the nothing relaly valuabel in there, my jewish cds arent such a hot commodity, so all was good, nothing taken.
class in general i need to be taking more seriousley, and yea, that's it. its not so hard the stuff it just demands review and work. this blog is so boring cuz im so tired.
i can't end liek this... i need a comic....

Of Grandmas, Gorrilas and Geshem

True, it has been only a few days since the last blog, but this one I might actually have something of substance to talk about. and if I don't, well...you can stop reading my blog. I think I should start with the first two aspects of my title today; although the whole world i think knows the story it is definately worth repeating. of if u think it's not go away...i mean go way down till after it's done...
Ok so at a very good friend of mine's wedding on monday someone dressed up in a gorilla costume. like those masocot things that all the yeshiva guys wear at weddings and especailly on purim getting trashed...aka getting tzedaka for their ever collapsing/poor yeshiva. ok very wrong generalization, but since i know u thought it was almost funny, and can't expect much more out of me, that mean spirited joke will stay, not that i really meant it to badly. back to ramblings/story: so the gorilla is dancing around on the men's side (or else i wudnt know!) in front of the chosson and kallah, like where all the guys make their sad trys to make fools and of course be m'sameach the couple. why a very well built guy and i(not well built) were slamming our bodies together during this is for another discussion, one that will not be discussed. ok so gorilla person is doing their little shtick, some dancing, wtvr, nothing crazy, it even tried to jump a little and literally did not make it more than 2 inches off the ground, fine, fine, maybe it's hard to jump in those things...i've never been in one..and have neverheard ne positive abt them either. as our gorilla friend walks off i'm so sure i see a glove come off to reveal a female hand with what really looks like a ring. so i was a little disturbed, maybe it was some drunk 20 yr old or something, who was dying for a shidduch, G-d knows..., i have noo clue. BUT no, that was not it, soon after sitting down, someone, who could barely get the words out he was laughing so hard, told us that the gorrila was actually a 65 year old grandma...well i assume she was. or then again maybe not, who wud marry such a nut. wel m/b she's divorced and was looking for a guy that knew how to dance becuz it gets worse...she was dancing, wittnesses say, with one of the biggest rabbanim of baltimore (!) that is flippin nuts. obviousley the rav did not know, at least while he was doing the little "keitzad merakdin" but i'm sure he would have majorly bugged out to put it very mildly had he known what he had just one. in the end, this woman was some nutjob, i must say, for wtvr entertainment she provided it was def not worth the slack she's gonna be gettign after 120; but not my problem.
ok, as far as the geshem, the nonstopalbe rain that drove me up the wall this morning i'm happy to report the Spring has been drying up now for the past few hours(o baby play on words, ne one catch that?!). but this is not b4 i got absolutely drenched while walking to good ol' plant bio because the supid md shuttle is so flippin full on rainy days it won't stop for us poor souls standing with the cows 15 mins from the humanity, dare i say it, of campus. so that really annoyed me. My feet were like sloshing around cuz one of my shoes discovered how to talk (yes) and the other, well felt to dry and somehow got wet too. of course my face and hair was soaked even with a hood and of course my pants were just a lost cause. so after walking into class sweating, soaking and annoyed i was thankful at least it was decently cool so i cud dry up a little and then i tried to dry up at hillel while making myself a little chair bed, that didnt really work becuz i really needed heat and noone had a blow dryer around. by the time i got home at least everything was dry exept my feet, which were cold and wet, so thank G-d for that blow dryer, it made my feet feel all warm comfy inside. i also blow dryed my notes, yes they were damp too. it sux also that i scrwed up my brand new accounting text book which costed me way more than i'd care to mention.
the follwing are in memory of wedding.




...yes, that seems to be the phoenix suns masoct..well i guess the woman has potential after all.

Excuse me?

Umm, am I in the right place? I haven't been here in so long. So much has changed, so many new people. Ok I'll just blame it on Maryland. cuz are'nt they blamable on everything? ok so basically school started and i lost patience, well that might mean i had patience...more correctly: i lost the majority of my patience to blog following the beggining of classes on wednesday. as far as classes go, they're gonna be hard-some-but the teachers seem so far so good so not tons of complaining yet. Awesome news is that 3 out of my 4 classes have notes online so that will make life all the more easier.
I thought walkign last year was bad, way out in the boonies near Comcast; well this year all the walking i do is much worse. Besides parking near Comcast again, ok about 15 feet closer than last year (lot 4!), my classes seem to be in all the worst places. so much walking back and forth. my dream would be to start class closer to my car and end it there too and whatever in the middle. something close to the complete oppossite seems to have happened. i can't go into details cuz with this splitting(figurative) headache my head may actaully split and well i have another 4 months i'll need it for. at least. please G-d.
So on tap for this extended weekend I have a vort and wedding to attend. is it that i'm popular, getting old or both? or neither? or maybe it's just that i'm lazy...where did that come from you may wonder? well put it this way if I get a chance/patience to blog about either one it'll be a miracle. so keep checking back...and be prepared to be dissapointed. or just enjoy watch as u make my counter go up up and uppppppp......
wow this sucks, no funny stories to tell now. or none that i can remember,
well this is stupid but in my accounting discussion today, the TA is like " I had Rymer (another prof) when I took this class and you guys are so lucky you have Bulmash, he's so much better, Rymer stunk". So that was good to know. I also heard that Bulmash is Jewish and like Orthodox kids and eats at Hillel sometimes...so I guess the other 4 orthodox kids and I will definately find a chance to nail him and finagle some points and stuff out of him before i drop his class cuz it's so hard... no no i mean before the semester is over.
have a good shabbos...and please don't hold your breath waiting for the next blog unless your that nuts 'wuts his name' who did it a few months ago in times square it's not safe to wait another week or so. and if you do, well...I told ya so. enjoy the hurricane.

Continuing in the monkey tradition, this week I present the Letter A

Forgive me

or don't but i have absolutely no patience to actually blog about our entire New England roadtrip.

It's too hot down here...I wanna go back up

Outta here!

Yes, I must sadly admit that it has taken me forever to blog again since the last posting of which was over a week ago...i think. too long, i know. no excuse, i know. no school, i know. trip driving me up the wall, i think the entire world knows.
ok time for a random tidbit into my shady life. last friday night (as in 9 days ago) i was walking with matthew and before i even got like 30 yards from my house i pass this girl and i take this double take on her...and i can tell she looks familiar but i can't tell from where, and she's giving me this same odd look. then it hits me that she was in my econ class just a day before, so we schmoozed like good classmates,hehehe, i wanna say i'm a little freaked now that she knows my house, or at least my neighborhood cuz man i hope she didnt realize that was my house, but heck wtrv she was almost normal, at least for a human of African descent [dang Elan stop with the racism] it's not racism i tell u, i was in fact decently impressed, she even was like "o i see it must be your sabbath" as if normal people walk around in a suit at 10 on a friday night. good call yo.
Fast forward to this pas Friday aaaaaaaaaaaand it was my last day at the great Community Transportation Development Center. yup, no more "good morning/afternoon Transport center"outta me anymore. o well u all missed out hearing my beautiful pick up lines. but of the course the best part of the day was my mom/fellow colleague asked me to pick up schwarmas for everyone at the office on the company credit card in honor of my last day. that was awesome. if u didn't know the office loves max's and schwarmas in particular, wut can i say , my office has good taste. too bad il be missing the ice cream cake party from baskin robbins theyre having on monday. but ill be much happier staying in the beatiful Berkshire resort of the Pittsfield Motor Lodge where windows are an amenity and AC is optional and the prices on the website are about $100 cheaper that reality. i was falling off my chair when i was reading through their website, so let's just hope we're not falling through the matresses when tommorow night rolls around.
so today i went to a shloshim ceremony of Mrs. Joyce Shankman A"H...nice, inspirational stuff. it was a surprise to see former redskin/crackhead Dexter Manley there, but actaully it wasn't but i have no patience to explain the connection, so if you're lost open ur mouth (or palms) and ask me. soon i'm going to noam's brother, mordechai's wedding which is gonna be awesome. i know her family is awesome becuz their sfardi, ok i'm a bit biased. and noam's fam, well it just goes without saying...
so as this goes to print the entire trip is planned except for a motel near Boston which i truly look forward to bugging noam about the entire 7 hours up to hartford so he's gonna haev to reserve that becuz i've just done too much credit card garbage over the fone to soem really shady places the last few weeks. on that note, jacob will hopefully get over his credit card loss/getting consumer fraud wtvr it's called but i guess it just capped off an exciting week for everyone, didn't it?? ok wow i better shut up while i'm behind here.
cranium--although i never met you, i miss you already, but i understand you're in good hands, maybe we'll try and get together another time..wa wa
know what's good now?? now i really have an excuse not to blog for a week! shavuah tov y'all.